Contact: Rachel Friedman, 727-443-7115 Ext 206
Rachel@newsandexperts.com
A Love Lost
Author Reveals His Journey of Loving, Losing and Healing
While Alfred Lord Tennyson's theorem that it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all is a noble sentiment, healing after you’ve lost is a difficult journey.
That’s the purpose of Rico Dasheem’s novel – A Love Lost, from CreateSpace (https://www.createspace.com/3375944) – a poignant retelling of his real-life turbulent romantic relationship that ended badly, and how he put his life back together after the fall. Dasheem tells his story, meant for anyone who finds themselves falling in or out of love, through a series of anecdotes, letters and poetry, including bits and pieces of his philosophy on life as well.
“There’s nothing like having a life-friend who is there with you thorough the thick and absolutely crazy things we put ourselves through,” he said. “A relationship like that is hard to find. When you do stumble across one or even nurture one to that level, do what it takes to maintain it.”
The journey began in a restaurant in Underground Atlanta where Dasheem worked in a bar restocking glasses and bottles for a young barmaid named Tonya, who soon became the love of his life. The two began a relationship that spanned eleven years.
Dasheem told of how he hopped from job to job, creating an air of instability for his family. He admitted to taking his wife for granted, and not supporting her as he should have. He also recounted an online relationship with an old girlfriend that caused mistrust to build between himself and Tonya. During the course of the relationship, he admitted to making business decisions that affected his family monetarily without consulting his wife. He expressed his sorrow at the loss of his relationship and accepted responsibility for his part in it.
Dasheem told of the pain and humiliation he felt during marriage counseling as his negative behaviors were laid bare to him. He was not, at the time, able to understand the damage he inflicted on his marriage.
‘It takes time, desire, and a willing attitude to admit flaws in one's character, and that day I was not moving,” he said. “The little distance that was coming between us acted as a spring board to the separation of our minds and eventually our hearts.”
Finding that marriage counseling could not work a miracle, the two decided to separate. Dasheem headed out to the west coast in an attempt to put distance between himself and Tonya, forgetting that he still could not run away from himself.
“Clearly I began to see the error of my ways and began to admit that I had faults,” he said. “This was the beginning of the real journey. If I had the courage to look, the will to understand, and the perseverance to continue, I would become a changed being. This was a turning point for me.”
Despite all that transpired, Dasheem’s love for Tonya never wavered. He continued to pine for his lost love and to agonize over the mistakes that were made. However, over time, Dasheem developed five steps to healing after losing a love:
• Denial: Be willing to confront issues
• Confront: By confronting issues you are seeking understanding
• Internalize: Process what you learned
• Forgiveness: Dissipate grudges and resentment. Forgive yourself and others.
• Continue your journey refreshed: Getting on with your life with a new perspective.
“Life is an illusion,” he said. “Nothing is for certain and nothing is promised. Enjoy your fleeting time here with your loved ones, let the trivial matters pass, and let the good times be stored in your heart. Life is short. Tomorrow is not promised to any man.”
About Rico Dasheem
Born and raised in Trenton, New Jersey, Rico has been writing since high school. “I discovered my writing talent during a high school project, in which I was asked to write a song. From that day forward, I became intrigued with being able to express myself as a writer, and seeker of truth.” This was the beginning of Rico keeping a daily journal. “I began to write poems, short stories and naturally progressed to writing books.”
To interview Rico Dasheem, or request a review copy of “A Love Lost “contact Rachel Friedman at (727) 443-7115 ext. 206 or email Rachel@NewsAndExperts.com Please include your name, publication, and mailing address with your request.
Live to learn to love
Learn to love to live
Love to live to learn
so that you may live the life that you yearn.
